HA-Ashley

Hi, my name is Ashley Grade: 6 Birth Month: 7/1/1996 Career Goals: SKATEBOARDER Favorite Band(s): green day Favorite Munchie: chips or chocolate Favorite Soda: coke Favorite Subject: P.E or I.C.T Hobbies/Sports: running and skateboarding

Bail of skateboard

“Be careful Ashley” mum called out from the kitchen. I rolled my eyes and called back “As usual mum-you know me always careful” (wink, wink) I grabbed my skateboard and headed once again-for the front of the house I can kick flip but every time I try off the step, I bail. I was determined that this would be the day I succeeded. “I can do this” I said in my head. First try, bailed. Second try, got it but landed a bit sketchy. I was pumped because I landed it but I could improve it. I tried again. Yes! Landed it perfectly in surprise. Last try for the day I said to myself. The board flipped nicely around but as I came down to land it, one foot missed the board and my other foot landed on the nose. The board flung up and hit me in the chin, and the blood flowed out like thunder storm. I threw my helmet in pain and ran inside “get a couple of warm face washers” yelled mum. Mum was texting dad as I was washing my chin. Mum inspected the cut. “I’m taking you to the Heywood Hospital” said mum concerned. “You may need stitches”. As I hopped in the car, mum started the engine. She sped out the driveway like someone getting sucked up in a black hole. Heywood hospital couldn’t help us as there were no doctors around. We had to keep driving the extra 30 minutes into Portland. Later that night I was unable to get to sleep. The spot under my chin where the doctors put the five stitches was really sore. Mum warns me to not kickflip of the step. I told her I wouldn’t, but I wonder.

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) -The plot is original, but since we are not into skate boarding we didn't love the story.

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? - There was suspense but not enough to get me excited. i think maybe if you add a few more details it would be much better. =]

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? -Yes the characters are life-like. They are fun.They are real people.

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story?yes i can see the story in my head.

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement?no where it was a really good story.

SMS Group #14 1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) I think the plot is original, but i don't skate either, but i like the story.

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? There was enough suspense i became happy! It is satisfying to me!

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? They are real people. They are herself. They are likable because she is kind.

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? Yes, i can picture her story, like i'm there with her

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? None of them. The story is amazing!

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) Yep it completely thought of and made by her.

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? The plot is obviously thought out but it could be changed a little to make the transitions between diferent places seem more real.

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? Yes that part is very well done.

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you see and hear and experience the story? Yes.

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? Details, thats it.

1. Punctuation, grammar, word choice. It was well thought up, and fit the theme.

1. On the level of story-telling: if you were the King (or the aliens), would you allow this story-teller to live another day? If no,why not? Yes it should live.

2. Be specific, try not to merely write, " this was good", instead explain what was good about it and why. Because it was good enough to get you thinking, and the characters' personalities were very clear.

3. Nominate "Hall of Fame" stories. Why not? As long as it fits in with the rest of them it should be there.

Saint Michael School
1. On the level of story-telling: if you were the King (or the aliens), would you allow this story-teller to live another day? If no,why not? Yes, I would it was interesting. 2. Be specific, try not to merely write, " this was good", instead explain what was good about it and why. It was good but a little more tension would of been great.

3. Nominate "Hall of Fame" stories. No, It was great though.