HA-Ben

Off we go camping for the week we got the motorbikes and the guns. At 12.00noon we are at the spot so we get the motorbike off the Ute. When we got the food off the Ute .when we can see a fox so I get the gun bang I got it. So we got it and got on the bikes when went out to the bush when dumped it. When I got back the kids are coming up in the car but went up to the and got the kids. But we are going out shooting so the kids can not come shooting because we are out pig shooting so you are going to stay with the kids. For a day or two ok so the boys got in the Ute and went out to go pig shooting bang yes two pigs we got one when went back to get the last one but a pig was coming to get me ran said Levi I got on the Ute Levi got the gun out bang the pig got shoot yes we got he. Go back out of the bush when we can get a beer when eat the KFC. So the next day Levi @ I are going to get a new phone so we went and got the phones when went back to the camp. When got on the motorbike and went for a ride out in the bush when we got back when went out shooting in the Ute and got one fox. So we went back when went to bed so the next day we got up and the kids got in the car Levi and I went yes so we can go to the pub. So back out on the motorbike in the bush and we got back when went to the pub the. THE END

Kirsten - HA Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?)

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement?


 * Hi, my name is ben **
 * Grade: 7 **
 * Best Holiday: to the river **
 * Birth Month: sepember **
 * Career Goals: sprint car race **
 * Favorite Band(s): 50cent **
 * Favorite Lolly: Lolly **
 * Favorite Food: lollys **
 * Favorite Munchie: lollys **
 * Favorite soft drink: coke **
 * Favorite Subject: pe **
 * Hobbies/Sports:bull riding motorbikeing football **
 * Pet Peeve: birds **
 * Pets: 1 cat 2dogs **
 * Siblings:3 **