Sophie

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= = =//“Spooky” said Matilda looking over the fence of the old spooky home.“Come on” says Borris “this was a dare.”// = =//Matilda & Borris got a dare of going to a really scary house on The top of a hill in Fancy Street they didn’t want to go but if they Didn’t every one would have thought they were chicken so the went!!!!// = =“Hurry, its almost time to go to school, we said we would have the picture by the time school starts so let go” Said nerves Borris. = = Borris and Matilda open the gate and walk up to the door. “Open it” says Matilda, “no you open it” Borris says with a scared look on her face. = = “Ok fine but if anyone asks who opened the door of the house it was me” said Borris poking himself. Boris opens the door when a ghost behind them says “boo” = = “Arrrrraaaaaaaaahhhh” Matilda & Borris scream as they run away. “Did we just see a ghost or was it just me” said Matildas.“I think it was just in our dreams” says Borris. “ =  

. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) not well planed 2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? i didnt even like get to know the characters 3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? again dont know the characters 4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? not described well 5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? everything. needs to be longer and more descriptive

---   1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) Not much happens and I couldn't say it's very original.

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? I wouldn't really say that there's a climax, or anything like that. No suspence either.

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? I don't even know what the characters look like, or anything about them. I barley know there names.

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? As far as I know, there were no more then one or two imagery details.

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? Grammar, punctuation and try to make the story more clear for the reader. Also, try using more descriptive words. You might want to try to make it a bit longer. -Carly