HA-Bailey

Hi, my name is Bailey Grade: 6 Best Holiday: Perth Birth Month: June Career Goals: to be a Historian Favourite Band(s): Green day Favourite Lolly: starburst Favourite Food: Pizza Favourite snack: BBQ chips Favourite soft drink: coke Favourite Subject: PE art Hobbies/Sports: motocross and football Pet Peeve: people who talk when I read Pets: 2 dogs 2 cats 2 fish 12 chickens

It was a bright sunny day when Mum and Dad came home with this guy they just picked up of the road. He looks like this man I saw on the news today that just killed tree men on the sidewalk. “Is he staying the night?’ I asked. “Yep in your room.” Just the thought of some guy Mum and Dad picked up of the road sleeping in my room gave me the shivers. I was watching TV that night when a heard a scream that sounded like Mum so I ran up stairs and I looked around for her. The Crazy man said that she went out for some milk. So I walked back down the stairs thinking Mum wouldn’t scream for milk would she? I turned on the TV again and I here another scream that sounds like Dad. Once again I ran up the stairs and look around for dad and the crazy man says he went after Mum. I started to think that this guy killed my parents! I quickly make up a plan to hit him over the head with one of Dad’s golf clubs when he falls asleep and then call the cops. It was 11 o’clock and he just fell asleep so I marched up to my room and he was sleeping like a baby so I gave him a good wack over the head with the golf club. He was out like a light. Suddenly I hear that front door open thinking that it’s one of his gang members come to save him but it’s Mum’s voice wanting the crazy man to come down stairs. “ He’s asleep “ I yell. “Wake him up then “ mum screams back. “ He was tired and said not to wake him up” Ok then don’t wake him up.” The next morning I’m eating my coco pops when the crazy man comes down stairs with a huge egg on his head. “Does anyone know anything about my head?” No sorry” I said. “Mum I think I’ll go to school early today.”

Siblings: Mum Dad and Tate DuDe May 2nd 1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) I think the plot is original and creative. I think it's original because how the plot sounds as I read it.

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? The character faces the issue of the crazy man and his identity. There is suspense that she faces, the character hears the screaming and doesn't know where the parents are so decided to hit the crazy man with her dad's golf club. The climax is when she hit the man with the golf club and I found the resolution to be satisfying. What could be added is that maybe she could have tied him up, called the police. Or when she was eating her coco pops in the morning that the crazy man got up, made a loud noise and fell down the stairs.

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? I don't believe that the characters were real. I found the characters to be likable and enjoyable especially the father and the crazy guy. I didn't get a good sense of character from the story's description, dialogue and discussions.

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story?

There was not too much details, there was a little. sms group 8 1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?) Yes it was original and interesting.

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed? The climax would be better longer and moe suspenful and more detail would make a great story. 3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions? I like that it was in a real life situation it was fun to read. 4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story? There could be more detail used to make it better. 5. What areas of the story need the most improvement? The climax and ending part could use more detail and tension to be better.

1. Think of plot—is it original? (If an adaptation, is it creative or interesting to you?)
 * Starting May 1st (2008):** googlyeyes

2. Think about problems that the characters face. Are there complications that add enough suspense, tension, or interest? Is there a climax that satisfies you? Is the resolution satisfying? What could be added or changed?

3. Think of characterization—are the characters life-like? Are characters likable and enjoyable? Do we get a good sense of character from many of these: description, dialogue, narrator's opinion, discussion from other characters, the character’s own actions?

4. Think of imagery and details. Do they help you //see// and //hear// and //experience// the story?

5. What areas of the story need the most improvement?

Saint Michael School
1. On the level of story-telling: if you were the King (or the aliens), would you allow this story-teller to live another day? If no,why not?

2. Be specific, try not to merely write, " this was good", instead explain what was good about it and why.

3. Nominate "Hall of Fame" stories.